Being God Reality - Your True Self


Throughout this website, I have shared knowledge and understanding on some of the traps of the New Age teachings which include the Ascended Master teachings. Many who have gone into these teachings and come out the other side have questioned why they believed in things the Bible clearly states to stay away from or does not include in it as part of our spiritual life we are admonished to live. I cannot speak why it happened for everyone who has left these false teachings but I can give some reasons.

With the belief in reincarnation, it is easy to understand that our past dictates our future. Lessons we failed in the past are given again to allow us to grow and make better choices. Ultimately, the best choices are those that are based on divine love. Yet, what is divine love? We cannot define God's love. It is too great and too far above our earthly experience of love. So, the path to divine love comes in many packages, all designed to take us to a greater experience and understanding in love. We are already that love in our higher being, but not by choice. You cannot be anything but divine love in the higher spheres of heaven. Hence, when we leave the heavenly realm by choice for a physical experience in the matter sphere we leave behind the part of us that knows God's love through and through. We are in a state of "forgetfulness".

This veil of "forgetfulness" helps us not rely on what we already are from our Creator's gift of His Being to us when we were created. Here in the physical plane, we can choose to be whatever we want. Some say this entire physical plane is an illusion. Whether it is or not, what we create in this plane affects the whole matter sphere and becomes a part of our manifested self. As the ripples go out from a stone dropped into a pond so is our every thought and deed. We are at the center of our own universe, yet so is every other conscious being of God. Every ripple each conscious being makes in their pond goes out and affects all the other ponds and ripples. From our perspective, we are the center knowing only our own inner thoughts. Hence, we cannot know the inner thoughts of another but are restricted in time and space to not automatically know ourselves as energetically one with all of creation. While in heaven we as spirit beings not only know our oneness with each other we also can know each other's thoughts. So this physical sphere is a challenge from our true home and being.

From my personal perspective and life experiences, I believe I know why I went into the New Age teachings and jumped wholeheartedly into the Ascended Master teachings. I was meant to. It was part of my life's plan. Many times I have been blinded to the truth or the obvious in order that I proceed ahead with my course of actions. Then, days, months or years later, I look back and wonder how I could have set aside my inner wisdom and knowing and "forgotten" to do something or to remember the truth I know within myself. Then I receive this inner wisdom that "it was meant to unfold just as it did". I had no choice, not in this realm. These are decisions made prior to coming into incarnation.

The belief in reincarnation did not come from my religious upbringing. I came into the world with that knowledge not hidden from my conscious awareness. I thought everyone knew this reality until I became a young adult and I desired to find a church that did incorporate that understanding. I always have been inner-directed. Not with just hearing God speak to me, but through inner knowing. This knowing what to do and when to do it has led me to be exactly where I should be on my personal path and led me to a church that did believe in reincarnation and why I jumped wholeheartedly into the Summit Lighthouse. Concepts that I learned from these teachings did not always fit with what I was taught in my church but because I believed we were receiving a higher truth I set aside what I believed and opened myself up to new and higher ways of growing spiritually. Even though their truths were not really a higher truth I still grew spiritually because my heart was in the right place. I prayed more; I fasted more; I sacrificed more; I studied more; and I loved more.

The Holy Spirit at Work
Throughout my twenty years in the Summit Lighthouse, I had many profound experiences that I believe were given to me through the Holy Spirit. I never had those experiences in my youth, in part because I learned nothing about the Holy Spirit outside of the understanding that the Spirit was one of the triune divine persons of God. I was too young to study on my own and for whatever reason, I did not receive a strong understanding of Scripture. This left me open to such New Age ideas such as Jesus became one with the Christ, but He was not the only begotten Son of God or the only Christ. Christ was universal and the only begotten and thus we can all become the Christ. It was a nice temptation, thought and belief to make everyone equal to Jesus Christ, but the incarnation of the Son of God, the man Jesus, whose life and death atoned for our sins and opened the door back to the Father, was not only not the incarnation of the Son of God He was not the Christ.

When I became a messenger for these "ascended masters" it was not by my conscious choice. I had no desire or personal longing to be a messenger. I actually spent the first few years being a messenger mostly embarrassed at my inability to be what I believed a messenger should be, which belief came from my past experiences knowing previous messengers for the masters. Yet, I did know the Holy Spirit. Regardless of my being a part of a false teaching, the Holy Spirit was with me. I was not judged for my belief in this church and its teachings. I continued to be inwardly guided by the Spirit.

How did I know it was the Holy Spirit? From countless small and large experiences where I received gifts, knowledge, wisdom, understanding, guidance, answers to my prayers, and physically felt the light of the Holy Spirit fill my form. We are guided to get the gifts of the Holy Spirit. Yet not only does the Spirit distribute spiritual gifts according to His will (1 Corinthians 12:7-11), He does more if we allow Him in. The Holy Spirit comforts us (John 14:16), teaches us (John 14:26), taking on the role of Guide and Counselor and leading us in the way we should go and revealing God’s truth (Luke 12:12; 1 Corinthians 2:6-10).

One of the several ways I experienced God's guidance is through dreams. Normally, we do not remember dreams, yet on occasion we have one of those dreams that heaven wants us to remember. Most of my dreams cannot be explained in human words. There is no correlation on earth to what I experience in many of my dreams even though I try to understand their meaning. Once in a while one of those dreams I do remember very vividly and because of so much detail I tend to try to understand the message in it.

Dreams on Being
It was almost twenty years ago that I had one of those experiences with dreams that I knew the Holy Spirit wanted me to pay attention to. It was very important to not only my spiritual path but what I would teach the spiritual community around me. Shortly after I became a messenger, the Holy Spirit came to teach me on Being. Although I kept receiving the word "being" I felt like a child receiving teachings on algebra and not knowing how it related to arithmetic. Consequently, it took me years to understand the concept behind being, although I would start teaching to the community around me about being right away. Yet, not only would I learn about being I was going to experience what was anti-being.

The fact of the matter is that very few people I have personally met are in the way of Being. The art of Being is seemingly lost on this planet. When I try to stay in the state of Being and keep harmony with those around me I invariably disturb them so I step back to keep the harmony and then I lose being. I will explain what being is elsewhere as it is a deep yet a simple concept to understand once you experience it yourself.

This dream was actually three different parts. The first part awoke me as I was disturbed by the experience. So I said some prayers for protection and then I went back to sleep.  My other two dream experiences I was not disturbed, but perplexed. I was awakened the second time with a dream that was puzzling, then I went back to sleep and awakened for the third time puzzled again with what purpose my mind could have been working on to have that dream. Immediately upon awakening in the morning I contemplated those experiences as I went about my chores and I became more excited and on fire and thrilled to be who I am.  I had ideas coming to me left and right.  I saw things I had never seen or realized quite so clearly and I could see ahead what I needed to focus on in being the self that God wanted me to be.  And all this came from those three dreams I had.

There are many theories for why we dream but no one has the definitive answer. Putting my experience together with some promising theories backed up by good sleep studies, I believe dreams have a wonderful purpose. Dreams help us differentiate between knowledge (retention of individual facts) and wisdom (knowing what they all mean when you fit them together). Dreaming improves creativity. Some souls who have brought some innovative ideas into the world have related that even a simple short nap gave them the answer to some puzzling challenges. This idea some dream researchers have concurred with.

Dreams can be recreations of real or imaginary experiences.  In my dreams they were imaginary, like an allegory story. They were images to create a picture that would be taken in by my conscious awareness through the subconscious, and created, I believe, by the superconscious mind.  Of course, not all dreams are created from the superconscious, but some are.  I can usually tell if I am receiving a dream from the superconscious because I am awakened to remember them and given the understanding in what they mean if I seek to know.

I believe that some dreams can be a powerful way for the Holy Spirit to reach you in the conscious mind.  Many may discount their dreams as meaningless, and many dreams are, but if you awake with a strong sense of purpose and meaning to your dream experience, study it and try and discover the meaning behind it.  It is your personal message and your intuition that will solve its message.  Some of these images (through dreams) given to my subconscious mind by the Holy Spirit I can still see them as if it was yesterday.  And these experiences always helped me over a hump of something that was not being understood in my outer awareness and an answer to my prayers.

The first dream I cannot remember too much detail outside of a few images.  I did not want to go into the awareness of it as it bothered me, so I started giving prayers so that I could peacefully go back to sleep.  What I do remember was that I was surrounded by aliens of every kind, face, and size.  It was not that I can remember if they look like the pictures of ET’s we have seen on screen or in the media, but that I knew they were aliens and that bothered me because I was surrounded by them and I chose not to be.

After I went back to sleep I had my second dream experience where I witnessed a large ape crossing a wide river on what looked to be a monkey bar.  Swinging hand to hand along the bar,  the monkey fell into the river.  I felt the presence of other beings, possibly humans.  They pulled the ape out of the river and laid him on the shore.  Then I witnessed that other apes also tried to cross this river via the monkey bars, but they too fell.  When I looked at the shore again, there were three apes laying on the shore unconsciousness.  They seemed to be shivering from the cold, and it was clear they might not recover without intervention. The realization I received was that it was part of the ape life that they cross this river via the monkey bars. The unknown beings had a choice to intervene and help these apes on the shore.  I did not witness whether they did or not as I awoke.

The next dream was quite more detailed and I don’t know how much of it is relevant to the whole, but I will relate what I think is. I witnessed that my youngest daughter had an allergy that was affecting her health.  My husband and I decided to take her to the clinic to be diagnosed and treated for this allergy.  For some reason, while on the way my husband was dropped off somewhere and my daughter and I went alone.  We reached the clinic and I discovered a group of people had just arrived and seemed to know where to go and what to do.  We didn’t.  My daughter lost interest in my negotiations, so I was left alone to determine where to go.  

We somehow arrived at a different door, a different mode than the rest of the people and so I tried to manage to get over to the group and go with them.  I found myself in a room that had many tables and a lot of people.  Again, most people seemed to know where to go and what to do.  So I discerned that there seemed to be a beginning table where you would check-in and receive a name tag.  So I went there but could not get anyone to wait on me.  I can’t say I was ignored, but I certainly couldn’t get their attention.  

Finally, everyone in the group was done and one woman was looking at the tags left.  There was one left but it was used, and so she went to go find me another.  Two other women behind the counter meandered off as if to take a break, although it wasn’t lunchtime.  The woman helping me didn’t come back.  I waited and waited.  So I decided to help myself and look up a doctor on the computer.  But there was only one doctor I could find and it was a dead end.  So I saw I couldn’t help myself.

Then, another group arrives and fills the table where I was at.  They were being helped and I felt like “why weren’t they helping me, I had been there already waiting for a long time?”  I felt like I needed to squeeze in and try to get their attention.  Although I seemed to be at the head of the line or group, I was not helped.  Then I saw this monster under the table.  At least it was a monster type form.  It was all teeth, and not smiling teeth, not fangs, but teeth.  There were several other creatures tucked in there with it, tunneling type of creatures.   

The original woman who was to get a name tag for me come up to me and handed me some substance like a shredded beef burrito, but not the name tag I needed. Someone came up to me and told me they saw my horses run away, not a recent occurrence, while yet distracting me from getting help and then I noticed my husband had arrived and found us.  I believe we were to pick him up but it had been so much time he had found his way to us instead.  And then I awoke.

Awakening to Being
Through my inner work, I learned that a lot of the spiritual work we did in the Summit Lighthouse was putting our human ego or human consciousness to sleep. The idea is that when the human ego is asleep we can be who we are and allow the real us to come out.  So the decrees we were taught in prior Ascended Master dispensations I believe were quite effective in putting that lower ego to sleep because of the hypnotic effect of long, repetitious, and fast decreeing.  The same for when our bodies are asleep, usually our soul can take flight and travel to the etheric realms for study, or even to what some call the astral plane if our egos are in control, where many astral type dreams come from.  If we have a dark side that is controlling us, and it is awake, it can also travel the astral realm carrying out dastardly deeds in our name, and so may the human ego.  But neither the human ego or the dark side can enter the etheric higher realms of heaven, only the soul which is the true self of us can.

What makes the dark side and ego awake in us?  Well, if we have not the spiritual teachings and background or the spiritual tools, our egos can be out of control.  But if we have spiritual practices in our lives like prayer and fasting we can keep the ego or dark side in check.  The idea is not to have the ego asleep forever, but to keep it asleep and checked until we have the God mastery to meet up with it and choose God love over any temptation.

While our bodies are asleep and the human ego and the soul are free to commune with heaven, we can receive spiritual teachings and insightful revelations into the subconscious from the superconscious, without the lower ego interfering.  And we can receive into the conscious awareness the understanding through these images and feelings received through the subconscious mind.

What I believe I was awakened to from these dreams was how being and anti-being can outplay in our lives and some of the consequences. The third dream especially represented the mass consciousness, the crowd/group mentality.  Yet, I saw that all three dreams were related.  The first message was the message that I lived among many alien species on this planet.  They looked different then I, the vibration of God or my image of God.  They vibrated not of God, and thus I was disturbed to be surrounded by ungodly creatures. They are not necessarily the homeless on the streets where many have some form of mental disability and cannot function properly in society. They are often those we see represented in the media who we hear about who have tortured and murdered others, deliberately inflicting pain and suffering on fellow human beings. They are those who are filled with hatred and pride and definitely see themselves as the center of the universe and that they can do anything they want without consequences.

In the second dream I clearly felt the ramifications of the conscious beings intervention with these ape creatures.  I saw that the ape creatures designed this method of crossing the river to eliminate the weakest of their species.  Those who could not cross the river using the monkey bars and fell, drowned or froze to death.  When the beings interfere with this and try to save the lives of these creatures, the whole race of apes could die as well.  I could see the future and the purpose of their demise because they might succumb to diseases by being weak and not able to take care of themselves and they also might have weak offspring, etc.

In the third dream, I saw the group consciousness.  I saw that if you belonged to a group and went along with the group you were taken care of.  There was no thought for the individual.  There was no thought about how one can help themselves.  I already knew my daughter's problem and what caused it.  I saw that it was some form of vegetable squash that caused her reaction.  I was looking to the doctor/clinic to give her the cure.  But why?  I already knew the cause, all I needed to recommend to her was to eliminate the cause!

Also, if you did not enter the one doorway the first group had, you could not go along with the group.  There was no other way. If you were not in the group, you were ignored, not seen. The computer was no help as it was not meant to help you but just a distraction. The people behind the counter didn’t seem to care to help anyone outside the group.  No one saw the monster under the table but me.  I could not figure out why they didn’t, but one reason was I at one point was back from the crowd and could see a wider perspective below and above the table.  The others couldn’t see below, only table level and above, representing what we don't see as the hidden darkness in ourselves and others that play havoc in our lives, possibly they represented this human ego/dark side. 

The woman who brought me sustenance (the burrito) was thinking I needed something to sustain me, as she was the only one who sensed me there and tried to help, but she couldn’t give me what I needed but brought me what she thought I needed—and it took her almost forever to do that.  The woman talking to me about horses was going on about something that happened years ago that was not important and long past, I didn’t even have the horses anymore.  Horses in my dreams represents being revealing to me that I was not being and lost it years ago. My husband was not with us because I needed to see he was always separate from me (us) when I needed help and support and he simply didn't care. We were almost to the end of our time together but I never got that understanding about him until after our divorce. I was not ready to see that then.

Revelation Within
As I saw all this from my conscious mind, I had this understanding deep within my being that I had been a part of what was a group consciousness on this planet and programmed into society. I had just separated from the Summit Lighthouse and their group consciousness and  I saw how I personally needed to step out of dependence on anyone outside of God.

 I saw the messengers as representatives of God and the ascended beings through them as one with God. Now I was a messenger and I learned firsthand the challenges of taking messages from heaven and giving them out to the world. How much was really heaven and how much was me or some impostor spirit? I had become very dependent on those messages for giving me what to do and be and I had lost sight of the inner knowing and connection to the Holy Spirit. Seeking help only from God does not mean we should not accept help from anyone. It means that if there is something we cannot do ourselves we can rely on God to send help our way and sometimes that is through another.

I saw in the dream that all our answers were not on computers, or in people who either were stuck in the past, could not see what was hidden or at their feet, could not go along with individuals or support individuals, and who were interfering with life decisions that only God and incarnating group souls could decide.

There was a big difference between the group of apes in the second dream and the group of people in the third dream where the people could only move in groups.  There was no individuality. The apes saw individuals as important to the group and were trying to cull the weakest individuals for the survival of the group.  How could the apes be smarter than human beings?  I saw that interfering with the apes and trying to help the individual survive would destroy the whole group.

The other insight was that while groups can be positive they are very detrimental when we lose sight of the importance of the individuals in the group and only focus on the group. Inversely, outside intervention from individuals who are spiritually ignorant and see only the individual and not the individual in groups can enforce their ideals on individuals while ignoring any group connection they have. That "help" was what was weakening or would weaken the whole group.  The apes willingly took the individual test of endurance and strength, knowing that if they fell they would surely die, and yet took the test anyway.  They were standing on their own individual strengths and the whole group honored this.

The aliens were embodied among the godly.  Among us, looking like us, are these aliens to God with none of God's divine love. They represented beings with no love for God or even a belief in God.  The second group were beings who had no respect and love for the will of the individual, with a false sense of love in doing what they thought best, yet they had no firm belief to base it on, questioning among themselves “should they or shouldn’t they?”  They had no direction but were guessing.  They had no foresight, no vision because they did not have the Holy Spirit.  The third group also had no love, in fact, they could not even see the individual except for a rare person here or there who did not know what to do or what was needed for the individual.  It was a herd mentality.  I saw not one person wanting to break out of the herd mentality, but quite happy going along with the crowd. They were like the New Age higher oneness and unconditional love individuals where "loving" everyone the same and never stepping on anyone's toes is equated with higher oneness with the all.

Yet, while seeing these flaws of humankind in loving God, each other and themselves, this understanding caused my heart to be on fire, my love for God to burn, my desire to serve to increase, my joy for life to expand.  I felt renewed and full of life and energy.  I knew that the individual counted more than anything in this world, and yet we are all a part of the whole.  What one individual does can make or break a group.  I saw that the key to freedom was individual freedom, with the freedom to follow the inner guidance taking into consideration the higher need of the whole, but done on an individual basis.  I saw that the strongest needed to survive to help the whole.  And I felt inspired to be strong, to help raise the whole, to honor the individual and their inner direction, and to teach and be an example of loving the individual while serving the whole.

I saw that I should not hold myself back because the group was not going along, or others wanted to be a part of a group and would not break out to be an individual.  I saw that I needed to change my perspective, in fact, it was changed and I could no longer return to the limited belief in the group mentality as the only way to go.  I saw that there would be no help from the general mass consciousness and that the few of them who desired to help would not be able to help in the right way.  And so I saw that the inner help of the Holy Spirit was the only way to go. To trust the inner guidance and wisdom, no matter the mass consciousness or group mentality or the human ego which is a law unto itself and does not want to step outside of the group mentality.  I saw we need to trust the inner guidance that is higher than our egos, and is the higher Spirit within us.

The way to Heaven is through a door.  Only one person can enter at a time.  The pearly gates of Peter are an analogy of that door.  The Path is an individual path back to God.  For a time, the group can help you as you don’t have to think and make decisions, you only have to go with the group.  But the next step up is to go it alone, with God, and God will light the way to serve the all.

I saw how many spiritual organizations were promoting the group consciousness.  And I saw the need to teach the next step, to rise above these naysayers to the path of Being and honor the individual sitting under their own vine and fig tree while still giving them the truth. We need to support the survival of the fittest, the fittest in God's truth and let the weakest truth fall down and die and let the truth of God survive amongst these alien cultures and beliefs that have nothing to do with God Truth.

While I experienced these visions and inner revelations they cannot be imparted to you with the significance of what they meant to me. Each one has their own needs and level of wisdom where each can receive from the Holy Spirit what the next step up the ladder of spiritual growth and being is for them.  Yet, I can still give you my understanding and some ideas on how to reach your own inner revelations, receive your own visions, your own intuitive answers, and your own individual way of Being.  

From these few minutes within the dream state, I was able to have a complete awakening to an important part in the step to Being like I had never seen before, with being the best we can be to help not only ourselves but to help others.  I also knew profoundly that my helping individuals was very limited.  I had been trying.  Yet there are over seven billion people on the planet.  I cannot put a fraction of a dent in the need of individual help, guidance, and healing that is needed for the people on this planet.  So I let it all go.  I let the need go to help anyone, already knowing that God is the doer.  But more than that, I know with the Holy Spirit I could help the individual, even if it was just one, by giving a universal teaching that would help set them free to be.  

The choice is always the individual in whether they will follow the crowd or be true to themselves. I am free to be who I am in God and I pray that in some way what I pass on to others can help them awaken to knowing what it is like to be in joyful freedom to be who you really are in the reality of God Being.

Happy New Year!