Listening Within to God's Word



It has been months since I last posted an article. One reason is that summer is always an extremely busy time for me with home improvements and good weather to do it, three large vegetable and berry gardens and eight acres of land to tend to with half a tree farm that need protection from the deer and encroaching invasive plants. We also rent out a summer cottage on Airbnb and this summer has been very busy as my oldest son also got married out-of-state and one of my daughters just gave birth and I help take care of the grandchildren whenever needed. Yet one other thing has kept me busy and that is my inner communion with heaven. And that is what I would like to discuss in this article.

When I write about the various spiritual topics I do a lot of research from many sources. I then process the information and discern what is true and what is not. We all must discern and process information and determine for ourselves what we believe is true. Whether we are researching on supplements for our bodies, what diet is best for us, or whether we believe heaven and hell exist or not, each of us processes and makes decisions in our own different style.

My purpose for putting together the information on this website was to specifically share what knowledge and experiences I had had with the Summit Lighthouse and the ascended masters, and to ferret out the truth about these "ascended masters" and how they came to be a household word in the New Age market. I believed in these Summit masters with all of my heart and soul, only to one day 'awaken' to the understanding that the end had come and it was time to return to my roots in Christianity and then to discern what was my purpose to believe in something that was not real.

Calling in Jesus' Name
Today again, with all of my heart and soul, I know these masters are not who they said they were. Yet, who am I to say so when I was believing in them for twenty-five years? While it is my personal conclusion and belief that there are no "ascended" masters outside of Jesus Christ, I also have presented many facts and other testimonies from those who were heavily immersed in these teachings with all their beliefs and have since "seen the light" and moved on. Some have delved deeply behind the scenes and shared many hidden facts connected to these ascended master movements. Between these testimonies and the facts, coupled with my own personal experience, I have presented enough knowledge here to help others discern for themselves whether these New Age and ascended master movements take one away from God or enhance one's relationship to God.

Since I first heard the voice of God or my guardian angel speak to me, my relationship with God has changed. Where once God was an impersonal Being who I talked and prayed to but never received an overt answer, today I feel I have a very personal relationship with God. Yet I cannot prove God, Jesus, or the Holy Spirit is actually whom I communicate with and that it is not some disembodied soul or spirit—or worse, the devil or demons in disguise. What I do know is that we are taught in the Bible that Jesus rebuked evil and we are to use His name to cast out devils. Paul gave us the example in Acts 16:18, "And this did she many days. But Paul, being grieved, turned and said to the spirit, I command thee in the name of Jesus Christ to come out of her. And he came out the same hour."

In the Ascended Master Teachings we were taught to do a lot of commanding and demanding in Jesus' name and to do a lot of judgment calls on evil and the evildoers. We also were taught to call to Archangel Michael every day for protection and to invoke a tube of light around ourselves daily as well. When one attempts to do good, resist evil and have a relationship with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit they can count on also receiving opposition from evil sources. Thus, having a personal relationship with the Holy Spirit or Jesus is going to be opposed by forces that will attempt to interfere with your communication and throw obstacles in your way.

Even though we might resist evil and pray daily we are still going to have this interference. At first, I believed that the decrees we were taught in the Summit Lighthouse to recite daily were enough to protect you, balance karmic debts, bring the judgment upon evil and change the world to a better place. When I started receiving inner guidance and hearing these "masters", I knew I had to pray and make calls every time I was prompted to receive this guidance. I had asked to be signaled on my ear when heaven wished to speak to me and this was predominantly the case. Thus, after receiving the ear signal I would make the call, "In the name of the I AM THAT I AM, in the name of Jesus Christ, I demand you show your light or be gone!" and then wait to see if the signal on my ear happened again. If it did, I trusted that the light was in command and this was God's will.

We are taught to "try the spirits" in 1 John 4:1-3, "Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world." The ascended master teachings also taught to challenge every voice we hear from within or without and to use the call similar to what I gave. After leaving the teachings I could not help but look back and wonder at all the communications I had with these "ascended masters" who I had come to realize were not heavenly beings. Why did not my calls work against these masters? I had some serious contemplation to do.

Struggling With Interior Battles
One of our most modern saints, Padre Pio, was a holy priest, miracle-worker, and stigmatist, yet Padre Pio was also regularly attacked by demons. Beginning in his youth, Padre Pio would experience incredible celestial visions but also suffer demonic attacks. In an interview with Fr. Gabriele Amorth, a leading Vatican exorcist, he said, “Padre Pio’s real enemies were the demons who besieged him..” Fr. Amorth explains:

“The devil would appear to him as an ugly black cat, or in the shape of a truly repugnant animal. The obvious intent was to fill him with terror. Other times demons came as young girls, nude and provocative, performing obscene dances, to test the young priest’s chastity. But Padre Pio sensed his greatest danger when the devil tried to deceive him by taking on the form of one of his superiors (his provincial superior or his spiritual director) or in a sacred form (the Lord, the Virgin, or St. Francis).”

St. Thérèse of Lisieux describes struggling with blasphemous thoughts in her autobiography. St. Anthony of the Desert was tormented by evil spirits as described in the biography The Life of Saint Anthony written by St. Athanasius. These struggles are sometimes called interior battles. The saints were human like all of us but they learned how to resist evil—and the devil does not like that. Consequently, they often were attacked and sometimes physically while yet they were under the protection of the Lord.

Mother Teresa's story of her struggles published in Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light, are her private letters to her spiritual advisors. Her letters reveal the constant mental anguish she suffered for fifty years. She was hounded by terrible thoughts that God seemed absent, heaven empty, and bitterest of all, her own suffering seemed to count for nothing. The world saw Mother Teresa as a living saint as she gave her life devoted to the poor without a hint that she was enduring this internal suffering. She was often overwhelmed with the thoughts of how could a loving God allow such suffering to exist. In the face of these doubts, she persevered by adopting a blind faith to continue her work.

What we learn from this book about these letters is that she prayed to join in Jesus' suffering on the Cross and she got exactly what she asked for. In 1951 she wrote that the Passion was the only aspect of Jesus' life in which she wanted to fully partake of. She wanted to drink from his chalice of pain. Jesus supposedly answered her prayer which caused her to feel abandoned by God. The more she cared for those poor in Calcutta the more sufferings she assumed, and the more she felt that she was without God.

Two times we read of Jesus' pain and spiritual trial when he was in the Garden of Gethsemane and on the Cross. In John’s account of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane, we see Jesus literally suffering so badly that he was effectively sweating blood. Jesus suffered with human loneliness. His disciples fell asleep even after asking them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, even to death. Stay here and watch with Me” (Matt.26:38).

Matthew tells us that Jesus “went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”" Jesus was in such agony that He cast himself to the ground in prayer. Three times he woke his disciples and then went back and prayed alone.

It seems at some point during their lives many saints have suffered what St. John of the Cross called the dark night of the soul. We know that for a time, Jesus would be separated from God the Father as he bore the sin of the world, causing him to cry out on the cross, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me” (Matthew 27:46; Mark 15:34)? The dark night of St. Paul of the Cross, an 18th-century monk, lasted 45 years. We learn through St. John of the Cross that rather than seeing his dark night of the soul as Divine abandonment he saw it as a purgative expression of God's love. Like Mother Teresa, St. Catherine of Siena and St. Teresa of Avila, theyrealized that the agony of doubt and desolation is a way of sharing in Christ's Passion.

Many Saints Bear the Cross of Jesus
While I do not put myself in the category of these saints, all of us are saints in our own way as we follow in the footsteps of Jesus. We can lack faith, doubt our prayers are being answered, feel spiritually alone at times, and if we hear internally, doubt the voice is of God and holy because we cannot prove it absolutely. So what do we do? Unfortunately, each of us has our own cross to bear and that cross does not come in the same manner to individual souls. We are all at a different level of spiritual attainment.

What the saints usually came to realize is that suffering is a purgative way of healing not only for our own souls but the souls of the many. These saints knew that to be one with Jesus and to follow in His footsteps they might choose to suffer as He did. They were sacrificial souls with a great love for God and their fellow humanity. Yet they could not choose how they would suffer or sometimes, as in the case of Mother Teresa, know that suffering would come with thoughts and feelings causing a lack of faith and doubts in the reality of God.

I have no doubts that my life's journey is exactly as it was meant to be and that going into the teachings of the ascended masters was part of my divine plan. There were too many signposts along the way that were given to me through the Holy Spirit to confirm I was on the right track. Even such signs as to experience intense sorrow when a sign appeared twenty-four hours before one of the major events in my life was about to occur that would bring a major turn that would bring loss of family, friends and severely affect my spiritual life.

Yet how can we really know that these signs and/or voices are from God and not from the devil and evil spirits? Unfortunately, we cannot prove to others what we know is true or real and other souls cannot know what we experience interiorly in the depths of our souls. We are taught to have faith in God, faith in His Word, and faith in our prayers regardless of physical appearances and what might outplay in the world of form. Faith is one of the most important attributes to have to keep our relationship with God holy and pure. In today's world, our faith is attacked constantly, especially the more we are connected with commerce and any type of media.

We can cloister ourselves away from the world as Saint Anthony and others did by escaping to the desert or joining a monastary, yet that did not stop and does not stop evil from finding us. Our minds are constantly being bombarded by the principalities from other levels of spirit. As Paul wrote, we’re not really battling a visible enemy but an invisible one (Eph 6:12).  Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light” (2 Cor 11:14) and we must be on guard that we are not taken in by any of these masquerades. Paul also tells us that Satan is “the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God” (2 Cor 4:4).

Paul’s received his mission directly from Jesus where our Lord said to him that He was “delivering you from your people and from the Gentiles—to whom I am sending you to open their eyes, so that they may turn from darkness to light and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me’” (Acts 26:17-18).

Learning and Growing From Adverse Experiences
We are here in this world where Satan has power and to some degree, it is by choice according to many who have had a near-death experience. We come here to learn and grow in Spirit and to gain strength in Being, while yet God tests our resolve to love Him and all that comes from and through Him that is pure and holy. In heaven it is easy to have faith, to love purely, to revel in the Light of God and want nothing else. Here on earth, and possibly in other levels of form, we do want other things at times as the temptations are placed in front of us adversely affecting our will to be.

God always answers our prayers and yet it can seem like those prayers are unanswered because we are not instantly healed or we still receive evil thoughts or adversity still appears in our lives even when we pray for protection and healing. We can seem to take wrong turns in life that either causes us suffering or brings us experiences we think were unnecessary and avoidable. Nothing should stop us from praying regardless of the outcome. Prayer is an essential part of following in Jesus' footsteps. Jesus prayed for what He wanted and then asked for God's will to be done. All our prayer should be thus, asking for what we want and then surrendering those wants to God's will. Then we know our prayers are answered—always.

Personally, my life has been filled with much suffering yet when I look back I would not change one major decision. I feel with all the fibers of my being that everything is in divine order. There is no guilt or shame in my choices except for the minor ones where I was blind to my thoughtlessness and ignorance and consequently hurt someone unintentionally. Asking for forgiveness when those times have happened—or when you realize in retrospect what was in error from your past—is absolutely necessary. Receiving forgiveness from God is also absolutely necessary. God always forgives you when you sincerely ask for forgiveness and vow to try and not make that mistake again. Therefore, we must accept God's forgiveness and thereby forgive ourselves. No sin is beyond God's forgiveness when we truly repent of those sins.

I do believe that teaching others is part of my work on earth. All of us have teachers above us and we all can be teachers to those below us on the rung of the ladder of life. So I have also received a lot of knowledge from religious teachers. One way to teach others what you know is to experience what you are teaching! That means that some of the best teachers are those who have gone to the depths of some negative experience and then come out the other side as in the example below. One thing I know is that God, the Holy Spirit, and my guardian angel, always bring me all I need to understand something and have the right information to teach. While I know this, some people are ignorant that they are experiencing the same thing in their lives, yet it is true for all of us, we are all guided whether we believe or not.

When I do something out of the ordinary for me I will usually find myself just where I need to be and doing what I needed to be doing to get exactly what I needed for the next step in wisdom and understanding. While driving I usually listen to music yet when I tune into the radio—or when I used to have television and I would turn on the T.V. at unusual times of the day—I would always receive something special. A few months ago I tuned into my radio instead of listening to music and heard a most inspirting story about Chris Poulos, whose compelling journey down into darkness includes homelessness, addiction, and then prison and then moving out of that darkness and into law school and eventually serving in the White House and on Capitol Hill. Today he is executive director of the Washington Statewide Reentry Council helping families and ex-felons rehabilitate and integrate back into society. In prison he formed a strong desire to help those caught in this downward spiral and going to law school was his first step to begin helping others.

Moving Into Higher Knowledge
Going into the New Age and ascended master teachings has been a very enlightening experience. Likewise, coming out of the New age has also been enlightening and something I am processing every day as I combine those experiences and ferreting out the truth, always returning to God for the final understanding and wisdom. That does not mean God tells me what is the truth in answer to my search and through my prayers. It means that God answers my prayers and searching by giving me what I need to take me to the next higher step in understanding. God also leads me to be somewhere doing something that I would not ordinarily do in order to receive that special teaching or knowledge or meet that someone who needs to enter my life or impart to me some special wisdom or knowledge. Sometimes I might receive words and sometimes it includes what I call "body symptoms". That is, I experience in my body pain, sensations and feelings that talk to me and guide me in this quest for higher truth. Psychics call this clairsentient where you obtain intuitive insight by way of physical experience in the body, like getting chills running up and down your body when you experience a profound truth.

My body symptoms have provided me with a wealth of information, yet like any communication with God, there is interference. The evil side likes to give me coughing spells that I cannot stop and happen at very inopportune moments. Yet that coughing symptom will also communicate to me when evil is present in an area or something is not good for me to eat, wear or be around. I have to discern the difference and then make the call to Jesus to take command and cast out any unwanted symptoms and interference. As with any gift, there is responsibility and tests that God allows. The same for clairaudience. Not every voice that speaks to you is of God and we must discern the difference. Those voices can be internal or external. The devil can speak through someone or enter your mind and thoughts as C.S. Lewis exemplified in his book The Screwtape Letters. Nothing is off-limits to the devil's work and interference in the world of form and the first example of this intrusion is given in the Biblical story of Eve and the Serpent. The Serpent is said to have whispered in Eve's ear with the famous words, “You will not surely die.   For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil” (Gen. 3:4).

I wait on God's timing to share my thoughts on Eve and her experience and fall. I have already shared many thoughts and teachings on the Fall previously as I was directed to do from within. Those teachings are no longer available as they were written in the context of the ascended masters teachings. Yet there is some basis of truth inherent in them. There is a connection in what I have personally experienced in this life and what outplayed in my Summit Lighthouse years and then as a messenger for these same "masters" with my husband. There is also a connection with this "Conscious You" teachings my husband eventually introduced and my becoming a messenger who spoke out against what I believed was a false path under the guise of the highest path to "oneness with God".

Remember that no one is a perfect messenger of God's truth. We must test the waters and try the spirits.

Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God: because many false prophets are gone out into the world. Hereby know ye the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesseth that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is of God (1 John 4:1-5).

I add to that that even those who confess Jesus Christ came into the world and therefore their intentions are pure can still give out misinterpretations of God's word. There are those who teach reincarnation and there are those who believe it is anathema and New Age and a danger to our souls to entertain. Both sides believe in Christ and have good intentions. Are both correct in their own way or can we look at higher truth as steps that we reach as our vision and understanding mature?